Impatience: Virtuous or Narcissistic?
2 minutes

Impatience: Virtuous or Narcissistic?

- edited by: Steve Piscitelli

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“I am extraordinarily patient, provided I get my way in the end.”
~attributed to Margaret Thatcher~

Impatience.

Does it—impatience—reflect our times? An internet search immediately brings up thousands of choices on our screen. We can get overnight delivery,  listen now to a new podcast episode, or watch live some streamed events.

No need to wait. Get what we want even before we know we want it. If the download is a bit slow, we get impatient. And heaven forbid if the overnight delivery arrives an hour or two or (oh, no!) a day late.

Impatience. Is it a virtue?

Such as continually contacting the city about flooding, sewage, or road condition issues. Or sending daily emails to the authorities about safety issues in your neighborhood. More importantly, we might move beyond impatience as we wait (and wait and wait) for social justice to be addressed and achieved. At moments like this, perhaps better words would be righteous outrage. Sometimes, impatience might lead to effective and appropriate action to achieve a higher goal for the community.  

Perseverance can lead to something bigger. This short video reminds us to believe in ourselves (and others) when we think what we want seems impossible to reach. 

Impatience. Is it narcissistic?

Too often, though, an act of impatience has less to do with urgency and more about our unrealistic (maybe even me-centered) expectations for the world. 

* The slow car in front of us. (How dare she get in my way!)

* The long hold time for a customer service representative. (Idiots!)

* The delay in our weekly garbage pickup after a major storm. (The city ignored me again!)

* The office meeting that tabled your idea until next month. (What a freaking waste of my time!)

In such instances, impatience is not necessarily a sign of superior expectations or elite standards or proof of superb discipline or work ethic. It can signify expected privilege, insecurity, or lack of respect for self and others. 

Such instances can derail collaboration, empathy, and goodwill. 

Above photo was taken by Steve Piscitelli in Cedar Key, Florida

Yes, impatience can move the needle for good. At other times, impatience might be a code word for unrealistic assumptions about the present moment about what we desire. We expend energy on negative reactions rather than positive responses. We hinder rather than help. We falter rather than persevere.  The community (the broader us loses).

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